Memo to all the ladies on the Fox reality show More to Love: Move to Humboldt County. It’s Fat Girl Friendly up here.

more to love

Tonight I watched the first episode of Fox’s newest reality show, More to Love.  It was billed as a dating show for the Real Women.  I give TV execs credit, for the chicken wing eating and beer guzzling men that watch these shows would rather be watching Size 2 women strutting around.  I mean, they have not tried this format before, have they?

luke

So Luke, all Six Foot, and three inches of him strode out of this big mansion, and met twenty ladies who were quite a site for my taste. All of the curves and full figures would have made me feel like a kid who suddenly found an open window to the Candy Store after hours.

All of these girls had the same basic rap:  Never been on a date, and had zero prospects back home.  Of course they attributed their lack of dating prosperity to their size.  Guys always wanted to get with their “skinny” friends.  I applaud Fox for taking the twenty largest women who inhabit Ubermodelia, the small island off the coast of Brazil where women who are the size of Supermodels live in apparent abundance.  The amount of tears shed just in the initial interviews led me to conclude two things:

  1. These girls must only be friends with figure skaters, gymnasts, and models.
  2. These chicks need to move to Humboldt County.

I will say this about the large ladies of Humboldt County:  a good majority of them are dating.  I have seen plenty of full figured women walking around hand in hand with their men.  These guys range from little skinny stick men, to guys so big I would not want to have to tussle with them.  Everyday, I leave my house to do my job, and every store, office, and pharmacy I walk in I usually will find a voluptuous woman and her man not too far behind her.  Size does not matter up here!

Are we, dare I say, more evolved?

I wanted to travel to where the show is being filmed, and just invite all of these full figured hussies up to our neck of the woods.  I would give each of them two weeks before their days of no dates, and zero prospects were to end.

I sat and chuckled as I watched the 330 pound Luke send five ladies home on the first night.  Five ladies walked away in tears, and sadly proclaimed that they were returning home to be alone.  I was thinking that for the very first time in his 26 years of existence, Luke finally got to dump a woman.  Not once, but five times!  He was right when he had said earlier that he felt like he was in heaven.  Yeah, it is heaven to finally be in the other end of that rejection.

If only those first five rejects would make their way up here!

After Publication Note: It has dawned on me that since this is a “reality” show, then it is well within the realm of possibility that these ladies were asked to embellish, err lie about the true nature of their dating lives.  However, if all the confessionals were in fact proven to be true, then the new show on Fox had no choice but to be called More to Love, because The Biggest Loser was already taken…

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9 thoughts on “Memo to all the ladies on the Fox reality show More to Love: Move to Humboldt County. It’s Fat Girl Friendly up here.

  1. Well, we’ve left “Boy” behind, and entered the manhood stage. Did I miss the rites of passage? Was there a party?

    This new blog of yours had better be as good as the last one, or there would be no use in your “maturing”.

    I think that the most important thing about a person, is not how big you are, but how comfortable you are in your skin. A person should make people wonder what they have going-on for them that makes them so self assured.

    If you’ve got it, flaunt it. If you don’t, fake it ’til you make it.

  2. Any area where the most famous bread company was called “Big Loaf” is definitely large lady friendly. 😉

    And welcome back! I except to hear the continued tales of Sally T soon. 😛

  3. Humboldt has always been welcoming to “wholesome” women. Wholesome guys, well maybe not as much.

  4. Hmm, you know, the few women I either accidentally or partially intentionally got involved with from Humboldt were in fact large ladies. Strange!

  5. What about that chick in that show “Arianne?” She isn’t overweight, she just got Oakland booty syndrome. Hell, all of those girls would get mad play in The Town. And that one blondie chick can’t get a date? What the hell?

    Not like I watch tv.

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