I hate myself for loving you!

I hate myself for loving you

Can’t break free from the things that you do

I wanna walk but I run back to you

That’s why I hate myself for loving you

-Joan Jett

I refer to her simply as “The Truth”. Unlike other cardio machines in the gym, she will not let you cheat.  No leaning over to shift your weight.  No shortening of your strides to reduce the work.  Oh no, you have to take the next step.  Other gym members have an excuse for staying clear of her.  Bad knees, old joints, and pulled muscles are what keep the weary away from her*. They are right, for she shows no compassion, nor can she be reasoned with.  She is designed to make you curse the day you climbed onto her steps…

…and I absolutely lover her.  She has taken over 30 pounds from me in the last three months.  For the last week I have been spending 60 minutes a day with her.  Oh she tries to dominate me, but I put up quite a fight.  Perhaps she is starting to respect me.  Others in the gym have marveled at my stamina.  I tell them only that I want it.  No matter how hard she may try, I will not be denied.  It could be that she and I have reached an understanding now.  Of course, she could be playing games.

Today I was getting ready for her by lifting weights.  For close to an hour I ripped up my shoulders.  When I was not looking, an awkwardly shaped lady climbed on her.  I stood up from the machine I was working at and stared at the lady and her.  How dare they…what is going on???  After a few longing seconds I returned to my lifting.  It soon dawned on me that the lady would not last long on her.  Like a bucking bronco at a rodeo, she would toss the lady in a matter of minutes.

Oh was I right.  As I was finishing my second set of shrugs, the lady was grabbing her music player and book preparing to dismount.  She lumbered off of her, and the lady made her way to the treadmill.  A smile came over my face, and I finished my third set of shrugs.

Once my shoulders were done I strolled over to “The Truth”.  With my ipod in one hand, I mounted her and spent 60 minutes getting an ass kicking that I hated so much I can only call it love.

I will see her again Monday.  I wonder if she misses me.

* I was told by the professional staff at the gym that the Stepmill is actually a lower impact workout.  When I had injured my hamstring back in April, I was still able to use the Stepmill without any discomfort.


3 thoughts on “I hate myself for loving you!

  1. Wow! An hour of climbing stairs. How many stairs do you think you traverse in that hour. I applaud you and your stamina!

  2. Well, according to the machine, I walk a total of 170 floors. I am not sure how many steps are in a floor. Every machine make has its own measures. I only focus on the time. One hour.

    I love it!

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